unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 2/7/2009 4:39 PM BST
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Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008 Last post: 18/11/2009 |
Linux-I am being wary of this as I definitely don't want him coming back expecting me to happily jump into bed with him. I have already thought that if he doesn't contact me I will be deleting him from everything-will also prevent me from being able to look at his page and photos which would drive me mental. Not incredibly important but I'm from Australia-him too, so atm the time-difference is horrible at 8 hours so when he is online I do try to contact him as I know there aren't many hours that we will run into each other-also why I've been asking for emails instead of waiting for us to both be online to talk. This too was discussed before he went. Curly-in regards to the other thing I guess it would be nice to talk to some people about it-just contemplating where though..hmm maybe the bar. |
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 2/7/2009 9:11 PM BST
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Total posts: 61
First post: 12/5/2009 Last post: 14/7/2009 |
HI again, Pink! To be made to feel helpless, unwanted, un-thought of, ignored, disrespected. All those feelings are enough to hopefully make you realise, if he is capable of doing this hundreds of miles away, then he can do it closer to home. You could make all the excuses in the world for why he hasnt contacted you - but its pretty damn obvious he has a good internet connection to be able to upload photos on FB!! So, a response in email or a nice chat in MSN isnt a problem either. He's having a great time and you are not on his mind while he is having said great time. He's ripped your heart out and I really feel for you - like everyone else here has but it is time to accept he has acted very badly and does not deserve your love or respect anymore. The hardest thing of all will then be when, once he is home, he is going to possibly come crawling back - can you handle that?? We tend to forget the hurt and pain when we want something that isnt good for us!
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 9:46 AM BST
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Total posts: 30799
First post: 18/3/2003 Last post: 16/11/2009 |
I was thinking of you last night Pink and I really feel for you. My ex boyfriend ignored me too - for months on end, at one time. I wish I'd had the balls to tell him where to stick it but I knew he had Problems and loved him very much. It made me so ill and now I'm seeing someone new, even though it's very early days, I'm shocked by how he picks up the phone and calls me, or responds if I text him. It's made me realise that this is normal behaviour, and that C wasn't normal and he wasn't loving. |
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 10:36 AM BST
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Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008 Last post: 18/11/2009 |
Sigourney they are feelings that I am starting to feel. I am so annoyed that this morning I missed an appointment I had with a psychologist-I slept in grrr and it really would have helped me. Lily, I am deciding in a few days-it is about a week since we spoke so I'm thinking if I hear nothing over the weekend I can't be bothered any more. I was thinking about it today and it just made my cry :( thinking that it is going to most likely be the end especially hard as up until a few weeks ago everything was so good. I don't even have a number for him which is so annoying! I am considering not even writing an email (at least not yet) as I can't honestly know what to say-there is so much anger and sadness coming up inside of me that I can't stick to one thought so I have considered just deleting him from everything and writing all my thoughts down into emails and letters (but not sending them at least not until I think I'm ready about it). I feel that if he isn't able to reply to an email who knows if he will even read it and then he can just be confused as to what the hell has happened. Have considered though if he tries to talk to me to just tell him to F*** off as he would know exactly how mad I am (I rarely swear and don't like to unless I need to) Still no news from him. He hasn't been online since Wednesday so I'm guessing he hasn't even seen the last email but the ignoring of previous emails and msn was bad enough. |
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 10:52 AM BST
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Total posts: 6855
First post: 4/2/2004 Last post: 20/11/2009 |
i think you need to find some way of expressing your hurt. I also feel for you. Being ignored, treated so insignificantly is incredibly cruel and heartless. I am thinking about you and I'm here if you need to rant. Heaven knows you do! |
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 11:10 AM BST
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Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008 Last post: 18/11/2009 |
Ive been using the exercise bike at home a fair bit recently-I can get as mad as I want on there and I at least end up feeling better about something by the end. Not sure what to even say about the situation with boyfriend though. Can't believe he couldn't even just say "sorry I can't talk right now-am busy, but I miss you etc" or something like that-1 sentence would have made a difference but he doesn't get that! And I can't even express these feelings to him. I definitely do feel helpess right now. Am very grateful that I am able to post it all here |
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 11:17 AM BST
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Total posts: 2993
First post: 15/1/2006 Last post: 8/11/2009 |
Hi Pink, So sorry to read about your boyfriend being so selfish. You are right - it takes a second to drop someone a line to show you are thinking about them. It's so thoughtless and selfish and he doesn't deserve you to be around when he gets back. Glad to hear the exercise bike is helping with some of the frustration ;) - have to say exercise is a much better thing to throw yourself into when you are feeling a bit down than drink or ice cream etc - so you can pat yourself on the back for that one! I was going to say I hope he gets in contact soon, but actually I don't - I don't think it would achieve much now except to highlight how long it has been since you heard from him. I honestly think you should try and write him off every replying in your mind, you will gradually stop caring and when he does "deign" to get in touch you can think "meh". I know it wont' be quite as easy for that, but he doesn't deserve to see any more. Take care of yourself. Miss L
Miss L
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 11:46 AM BST
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Total posts: 30799
First post: 18/3/2003 Last post: 16/11/2009 |
Wau Wau is right - it's so important for you to express your feelings. Right now he's still got you in limbo, not knowing what's going on. At least if you take the initiative and say, it's ended, you will have said your piece. He has been online, he could quite easily have called you, and he didn't even respond to a difficult time in your life - he's behaved appallingly. I'm so very sorry, I know how much this hurts - but it is him, not you. If he does get in touch, please don't accept any excuses - there are none. It's much more tempting to believe then, but nothing will wash. Nothing. |
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 1:50 PM BST
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Total posts: 32
First post: 30/12/2008 Last post: 18/11/2009 |
Hey again, I know it must be hard for you to hear all this, I'm sure you're probably desperately wanting him to be able to explain all this away, but I have to reluctantly agree with everyone else ... if he's too busy enjoying himself to talk to you, especially with everything else going on for you, it's a complete lack of respect, which if ignored, would creep into other areas of your relationship. I would def post in the Bar or wherever you think is most appropriate and take advantage of the wealth of wisdom on here and just make sure you have a frigging good weekend!! Ring up as many mates as you can and make sure you're busy busy busy so you wont be sitting around thinking about him and tempted to contact him, just that one more time, to see if he replies. Cos even if he does, it's not fair what he's done to you already. I'm really sorry, I was hoping for a magical perfect excuse from him for you but it seems like he's just not the guy you thought he was. xx |
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Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
posted at 3/7/2009 1:52 PM BST
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Total posts: 61
First post: 12/5/2009 Last post: 14/7/2009 |
In Response to Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...: Wau Wau is right - it's so important for you to express your feelings. Right now he's still got you in limbo, not knowing what's going on. At least if you take the initiative and say, it's ended, you will have said your piece. He has been online, he could quite easily have called you, and he didn't even respond to a difficult time in your life - he's behaved appallingly. I'm so very sorry, I know how much this hurts - but it is him, not you. If he does get in touch, please don't accept any excuses - there are none. It's much more tempting to believe then, but nothing will wash. Nothing. Posted by Lily As wau wau and Lily said. Pink, sweetie! The only way you can get through this is to remember the pain and disappointment he made you feel - that should shield you incase he does suddenly realise you've dropped communication and decides to *butter* you up. After all, it wont be as exciting when he comes back home and then there will be little you waiting there for him - or so he damn well thinks!! He will make up the most amazing excuses as to why he didnt keep in touch. Call his bluff - remain strong, stop attempting to say anything to him (he is ignoring you) and keep up the exercise. Rant here for as long as you need to...
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic
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