unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...
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Forums  »  Relationships  »  Relationships  »  unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 12:06 PM BST
Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008
Last post: 18/11/2009
hi all, hope this isn't too confusing, just don't have anyone to talk to about this.

i feel as though my bf is distancing himself as a way to break up with me :S he's overseas atm for travelling-its already been a month that he's been away but the past 2 weeks havent felt too great. last monday (22nd june) we had a big chat which was really nice-at that stage everything felt great-didn't feel insecure at all. but since then ive only had 2 5-10min chats on msn about nothing. having gone from talking on the phone everyday to this its really hard (it is a long-distance relationship normally). i know he's been online but not talking to me which will probably seem like a little petty thing to a lot of people but for me and him it's odd to be on and not to talk to each other. he's online atm but not talking to me ( i have started talking to him on msn with no reply). the past few days i have had some low moments to do with a few things in my life and have emailed him saying i needed to talk to him as i havent for a while and im feeling down. also on facebook he hasnt re-accepted my relationship request (after a stuff up with facebook) which he is saying he has but it must be facebooks fault. i just dont like the fact that he is ok with everyone thinking he is single while travelling-doesnt make me feel too great :(

am i just being paranoid? dont know who else to talk to this about :S

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 12:57 PM BST
Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008
Last post: 18/11/2009
talked to him on msn-no reply-10mins later he signed out
then he went on facebook-i talked to him on the chat-no reply...he signed out

i feel so sh*t right now :(

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 1:12 PM BST
Total posts: 6855
First post: 4/2/2004
Last post: 20/11/2009
I hate to say it, but it does seem rather odd. I would feel just like you do – pushed aside, and like he is deliberately distancing himself. But then again, I am an eternal insecure anxious type.
Have you asked him outright?
It could be that he's busy, overworked stressed and caught up in stuff, but you know him better than me and you have noticed that his communication has almost stopped and the nature of it has lost its intimacy.
I would straight out asking him how he's feeling. x x

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 1:17 PM BST
Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008
Last post: 18/11/2009
i can't ask him straight out how he's feeling cos he's not replying to a single thing :(
i honestly feel that ive just been dumped but he didnt even do it :S
he's travelling only for a holiday-no work-no commitments. and he was online for more than an hour just then with nothing
im being completely ignored. he is offline now and i dont even have a contact number for him :( im going to go crazy :S :(

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 1:24 PM BST
Total posts: 6855
First post: 4/2/2004
Last post: 20/11/2009
that's extremely unkind and hurtful of him actually. It's perfectly natural for you to feel so dreadful in this situation. It's very selfish and cowardly if he has decided to just switch off and disappear. How long have you been together?
x

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 1:27 PM BST
Total posts: 386
First post: 24/3/2009
Last post: 10/11/2009
Is it possible that someone had used his laptop and he was automaticially signed in? I know my OH's housemates would regularly use his laptop and ignore any messages coming in...was frustrating.
Mountains rise and fall, and under them the Turtle swims onward.
Men live and die, and the Turtle Moves.
Empires grow and crumble, and the Turtle Moves.
Gods come and go, and still the Turtle Moves.
The Turtle Moves. - Terry Pratchett "Small Gods"

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 1:33 PM BST
Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008
Last post: 18/11/2009
thanks for the replies

wau wau we have been together almost 8 months. it seems so strange cos he hasn't acted towards me like this before :S i know sometimes people just turn off but i am feeling so bad at the moment. last time we spoke he was happy and said we would talk in some days. that was saturday

sleepybird-he is travelling and is either in a hostel or with a friend who has their own computer. his comp has a password and he had done some things on facebook while i was online..

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 1:40 PM BST
Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008
Last post: 18/11/2009
just wrote him an email asking what's going on..haven;t talked for a bit and that i have some other things not going too well and that i would love to hear from him
:S

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 1:58 PM BST
Total posts: 30799
First post: 18/3/2003
Last post: 16/11/2009

That was very polite of you ... if it isn't what Sleepybird thinks, then he has been rather rude and cruel.  I don't think you are out of order in being upset.

Re: unsure if it's the end or the beginning of the end...

posted at 1/7/2009 2:09 PM BST
Total posts: 298
First post: 20/4/2008
Last post: 18/11/2009
its good to hear im not getting upset over completely nothing. i just can't stand having to wait to hear from him. i emailed him last week and he never replied so im not too convinced he will write anything.
on monday i saw some pics on facebook that he put up a few weeks ago and i wanted to ask him about them-didnt even mention this to him yet just cos i wasn;t comfortable seeing them so i was already on edge and a bit upset and then today he doesnt even acknowledge me

i wish i had a contact number and sort it out now but i dont and i cant :( i hate having to wait til he feels like coming online and then to see whether he feels like talking to me :(
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