*Sorry, I have changed my mind about posting this.

Based on what you've written, you can't really talk to your mum about it. If you have a difficult relationship with her already, this isn't going to make it any easier!

I think the thing to remember here is that you don't HAVE to do anything. He wants to make contact, but it's taken him 30 years to get round to it, he can wait a bit longer, or he can whistle, depending on what you decide to do. So take your time. make up your own mind whether or not you want to see him, and whichever way you decide, work out for yourself why. Does the other relative he's in contact with know anything about the background? Can s/he fill in any details for you? You're not committing yourself to seeing him if you ask, just gettig more info to base your decision on.

It's not an easy situation to be in, and it's one of those where we tend to think we'd just like somebody else to tell us what to do, but this has to be what you want. You have to live with it. You may find out you really like him, but what if you don't? Could you shrug it off and go back to no contact? Would you be even more let down if, having made contact, he didn't want to keep it up? Is your curiosity roused, so yo'd like to know one way or the other? If you really liked him, and planned to make him part of your life (or even if it was just going to be sporadic contact) you'd have to tell your mum. That's by no means a reason not to see him, but it is something to think about.

I'd recommend putting it out of your mind for a week and letting your subconscious stew on it, but you'll probably not manage that. But at least make up your mind that you won't rush into a decision.

BJx