Did I over react?
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Forums » Relationships » Relationships » Did I over react?
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Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 1:42 PM GMT
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Total posts: 101
First post: 14/12/2008 Last post: 23/11/2009 |
Hi Everyone. Please can I have some opinions? I met a guy about two weeks ago when I was out. We hit it off and swapped numbers. Since then we have been texting a lot. Because of our schedules w had not really had the opportunity to meet up andhave a date until last thursday. We went out for dinner and had a really good night. At this point I should mention he has just become a policeman, and was workin nights, so after our dinner he had to go off to work, so it wasn't a long date. We arrngedfor hime to come over to mine last night (saturday) we both fancied anight in nd I felt comfotable enough with him to have him over (plus he's a cop, right?) So before he came over, and bearing in mind it was Halloween last night, he sent me this text; "Hi Hun, be aware that some guy is going around in a black jacket and vampire mask on assaulting women when the open he door. My mate who is working tonight round here has just rang me. Watch it when you are opening your door." I thought to myself, awe that's sweet that he's being protective. The thought of this man did unerve me and I text all my friends to warn them. At 8.30 he knocked at the door. I was careful to look through the window and make sure it was him before I opened it. When I let him in, he said, "are you ok?" and I said, yeah i'm just glad you're here coz i've been a bit jittery. he said, what about? so I said the guy who is assulting women. He said, "oh that was only a joke, I was going to knock at your door in a vampire mask and do trick or treat, but thought against it" I wasn't impressed, I told him that I didn't think it came across as a joke and I had warned all my friends. he couldn't understand why I'd be upset. I had to ask him to leave. I felt he shouldhave been more responsible being a policeman, and it's not like he's kid, he's 39! He has text since asking if i'm going to complain about him. I've said no, I don't want to make any trouble or his career, but i've told him to leave me alone now. I can't date someone who is so immature. He has been texting almost blaming me for over reacting. What do you think?
Lilly xxx
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Re: Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 2:44 PM GMT
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Total posts: 5441
First post: 26/2/2006 Last post: 14/11/2009 |
Well I can see your point of view , only because you haven't known him long, but really I do think you're over reacting. It was a joke....maybe not in the best of taste, but not a reason to tell him to go and never come back!
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Re: Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 3:08 PM GMT
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Total posts: 101
First post: 14/12/2008 Last post: 23/11/2009 |
Really Elsie? You think? You surprise me, every other woman I've spoken to has been really shocked by his behaviour. I honestly can't see how something like that could ever be read as a joke. I asked him to leave because basically, after that I just didn't find him attractive anymore.
Lilly xxx
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Re: Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 3:30 PM GMT
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Total posts: 1122
First post: 14/11/2005 Last post: 3/11/2009 |
On first reading of his text, I immediately thought it was a joke and that he was thinking of turning up on your door looking like that, but obviously thought better of the idea. I can understand why you'd feel the way you did, and if it's put you off him, then no point seeing him again. |
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Re: Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 4:28 PM GMT
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Total posts: 745
First post: 5/12/2008 Last post: 21/11/2009 |
Lilly I would've thought it was a joke as well... I would've expected him to turn up in a mask if I'd got that text. I can totally understand if you misconstrue something like that it can be quite upsetting and it was possibly something that would've worked better if you'd been out a few times. I've been out with a policeman before and he was still just a bloke - he had a cracking sense of humour and I could totally picture him doing the same sort of thing. I can see why you wouldn't want to see him again but don't let it put you off - it was just a practical joke in poor taste! xx
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And no, it already being dead isn't much better. You still ATE A MOTH!!  Posted by Stonker ah ta angie, just stick a fag in a potato and that's good enough for me x Posted by Nato |
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Re: Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 7:07 PM GMT
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Total posts: 20328
First post: 11/6/2005 Last post: 23/11/2009 |
In Response to Re: Did I over react?: Lilly I would've thought it was a joke as well... I would've expected him to turn up in a mask if I'd got that text. I can totally understand if you misconstrue something like that it can be quite upsetting and it was possibly something that would've worked better if you'd been out a few times. I've been out with a policeman before and he was still just a bloke - he had a cracking sense of humour and I could totally picture him doing the same sort of thing. I can see why you wouldn't want to see him again but don't let it put you off - it was just a practical joke in poor taste! xx Posted by Angelina* I thought exactly the same.. just because he's a copper doesn't mean that he isn't a 'normal' bloke.. he did something in bad taste and it back fired on him.. if you had been going out with him longer then it might not have gone down like a bag of hammers but it might make him think in future about his pratical jokes. |
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Re: Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 8:14 PM GMT
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Total posts: 30799
First post: 18/3/2003 Last post: 16/11/2009 |
Personally I think you did over-react - blimey! I would have sussed straightaway that was a joke, admittedly not a great one, but I can't help feeling sorry for the poor bloke, first chucked out over it and now worried about his job. I can't believe you asked him to leave! I agree with those who've said everyone's idea of a joke is different but I think you might have been rather uber-hasty.
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Re: Did I over react?
posted at 1/11/2009 8:19 PM GMT
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Total posts: 591
First post: 10/10/2008 Last post: 12/11/2009 |
I think it depends on how sensitive you are, I wouldn't have taken it as a joke. I expect I would've told him straight away that I didn't think it was funny, hoping for an apology so we could start again and then at least he would know not to do that again!! On the other hand, if he's going to try and blame you for over-reacting you're probably better off! |
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