A guide to... finding Mr Right

Sorry, a knight in shining armour won't be sweeping you off your feet - but maybe there's something better out there...

We've been force-fed all the fairy tales and we've fallen for the soppy rom-coms. But while Snow White's prince did finally turn up, our obsession with finding Mr Right might be precisely what's robbed us of the happy ending we crave.

As for blokes, they've been attacked for being too macho and then hounded for not being macho enough. And if they haven't got enough hair on top, there's too much on the bottom. But with modern men increasingly falling short of our ideals, isn't it about time that us girls took a critical look at own criteria? Maybe we need to take stock and realise that we shouldn't be put off by less than perfect looks, if only because one girl's knight in shining armour is another girl's syphilitic dwarf.

But with a million UK couples in long-term relationships living apart and the number of women deciding not to reproduce doubling in the last 15 years, it seems we're far too hung up on picture-book perfection to face relationship reality. Are we ever going to accept that we can't expect excellence if we're far from a perfect 10 ourselves? If you produce more gas than a field of grass chewing heifers, only a hearing-impaired partner with a poor sense of smell will pave the path to your happiness.

The United States is the worst offender in the 'make believe man' stakes. A NY Times columnist recently put the shortage of happily paired career girls down to the modern male's fear of women with power. But I reckon there's far more to it than that - this trend is not just down to a bunch of men who can't stand their babes having a bigger bank balance. With Hollywood's rendition of romance to rouse you at every multiplex, the stark reality of man boobs instead of pulsing pecs and a raised toilet seat rather than a rose-strewn bed can be a bit of a let down. Surely it's not just that today's men are scared of strong women; it seems far more likely that strong women have unrealistically high expectations of their potential mates.

While we should ditch our dating delusions there are certain factors that are guaranteed to turn Mr Right in to Mr Very Wrong. My advice is to forget pretty boys - just like peacocks they're all about preening. And you should never pair up with a partner who's better looking than yourself. Think Monty Don rather than Adonis. Better to have someone who spends more time running his fingers through mud than his hair. You may not always get your garden of Eden but at least he'll do the weeding.

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