Bottoms up
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Mistress Absolute
Once consigned to the comedy dustbin with the likes of Benny Hill and the Carry On films, spanking is making a comeback. Here dominatrix and spanking expert Mistress Absolute shares a few a tips on how to get a handle on it and have a spanking good time
Peachy plan
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Couple
Before bending over, sit down with your partner and work out what you both want to get out of the spanking. Do you want to be spanker or spankee, or do you want to take turns? Do you want the spanking to lead on to sex? Do you want it to hurt a lot, or a little? You can work some of this out along the way but the more you talk about it beforehand, the more pleasurable the experience will be
Acting up
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Sexy nurse outfit
How about introducing role-play into your spanking? You can have great fun disciplining each other in teacher/pupil and doctor/patient relationships, to name just two possibilities...
Bare back
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Spanking whip
The most common type of spanking is with the hand on the bare butt or with knickers/pants on. But lots of people use belts and slippers instead of the hand, and there\'s also a wide range of implements that you can buy to spice things up...
Big softy
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Woman with paddle
Using a paddle is fairly easy to master; and whips made with human or horse hair look lethal but are actually quite soft on the behind. Sometimes just the look of a spanking implement can excite you both. And holding one can feel so good...
Pain in the arse?
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Couple
Spanking isn\'t about hurting someone. Take the advice Mrs Dorothy Spencer administered in her book Spanking Plan, published in 1936 - spanking should never be given in anger, only in love
Butt check
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Woman\'s bottom
The spanker should look for signs as to whether the person being spanked is enjoying him/herself. If their body stiffens, for example, it\'s an idea to stop and give their bottom a rub before continuing
Er, that means no
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Woman
As with all kinky bedroom games, no matter how soft or gentle, work out some safe words such as amber and red, for \'that hurts\' and \'stop\'. Choose words that won\'t be confusing if you\'re role-playing
Behind the scenes safety
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Contact lens
It\'s important to find out if the spankee you\'re with wears contact lenses or has any serious problems, such as a heart condition or diabetes, for obvious health and safety reasons
Science behind it
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Woman in underwear
You may have heard people talk about the \'sweet spot\', which is a sort of spanking G-spot. It\'s located on the most muscular part of the bottom, by the crease line. Some people swear by its erotic worth but there are others who dispute its very existence
Be imaginative
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Masked woman
Think creatively about spanking and have a go! Don\'t be afraid to give it a try. And if it turns out that spanking isn\'t really your cup of tea, just move on without a backward glance and try something else
Where to practise your technique
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Spanking paddle
London-based sex boutique Coco de Mer runs a series of spanking salons in its Lessons In The Art Of Loving series. To find out more visit www.coco-de-mer.co.uk or call 020 7836 8882.
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Mistress Absolute takes spanking classes at Coco de Mer and can teach individuals. To find out more visit www.mistressabsolute.com or check out her fetish room at www.clubsubversion.com
