There are no two ways about it, you just can't underestimate the importance of foreplay in a sexual relationship. The act of penetration is nice, of course, but without anything extra going on, sex can get really boring, really quickly. And of course, the consequences of a dull sex life stretch far beyond the bedroom. Why? Because foreplay is not just about turning each other on, it's about getting to know each other and taking pleasure in each other's excitement. Both men and women can feel not only unsatisfied but also uncared for if they regularly have sex without foreplay. But the good news is that even if you've been putting up without foreplay for a while, it's easy and fun to bring it back into your relationship. Here are a few ideas on how to go about it...
Keep your knickers on
Refusing to take your knickers off can be such a turn-on for you both - allow him to do everything he normally does when you make love, as far as your knickers will allow. Lots of women achieve pre-sex orgasms this way as a great deal of rubbing goes on. Pull your pants aside when you think he deserves it.
Dance
Dancing is one of the most primitive forms of foreplay. Get him all to yourself one night, put on a good soul classic CD - Marvin Gaye is wonderfully horny - and dance together, clothed at first. But then begin to strip. And strip him too. Slowly... Don't go for penetration until you're both naked and aching for it.
Tie each other up
You don't have to be into full bondage to try this - it can be done using belts and neck-ties. And a little physical restraint can work wonders. When he's tied up, sit on him, strip for him down to your knickers, then press your crotch against his mouth before getting completely naked and turning to handle his erection (it will be there!). Then turn back to rub yourself on him again. Most people can only stand this for about 10 minutes - but it's a great 10 minutes! If you're the one tied up, he divides his attention between your crotch, your mouth and your breasts.
Tell him you won't be wearing knickers one day
Allow him to feel you up now and then as the day goes on and you get moments of privacy. This brings foreplay right into your daily lives. By the time you're alone in the bedroom neither of you will need warming up to the idea of sex.
Get into skin tricks
Rub ice cubes over each other (great on the back and feet) -test on your finger first to check it isn't going to stick. This is strangely exhilarating. Lick or wet an erogenous zone and blow lightly onto the area until your partner's desperate to be touched there (take care not to blow directly into orifices). Essential oils are also a standard favourite. Drive each other wild by squirting some oil all over yourselves for some slippery foreplay fun.
