Is going on a date with someone you met on the internet a desperate act, or is it in keeping with the times? After a string of man disasters I took the plunge and met up with a bloke I'd been chatting to via a dating site. At first I'd convinced myself my surfing was just a bit of amusement. I hadn't been planning on meeting anyone, and I firmly believed it was the sort of thing only greasy-haired IT technicians and middle-aged divorcees had to resort to. But not me. Oh no.
Then I got chatting to Gary online, and we moved onto texting, and the odd phone call. He seemed intelligent and witty, and was quite persistent about meeting up. I wasn't convinced – until I made the fatal error of sleeping with my ex-boyfriend one evening and opening an emotional can of worms. After that I needed a distraction, and there was Gary – a pleasant guy just a few tube stops away wanting to meet for a harmless drink – so why not?
On the way to the date I was unbearably nervous, partly because I didn't know what to expect. I was wondering – if he goes looking for women on the internet, does that mean there's something drastically wrong with him?
But according to a recent survey, the internet came second only to work as the best place to meet a new partner. So why did I feel so shameful doing it? I'd even lied to my friends, saying I was meeting someone I'd got chatting to in a pub.
When I finally confessed the truth to one and all, it was obvious why I'd felt inclined to keep my secret under wraps. No matter what anyone says, our nation has labelled net romance 'just a little bit sad and slightly weird'.
When I confessed to my mate Anton about my internet date he laughed so hard I had to push him off the sofa. 'It's just a bit tragic – it's for people too scared to go out in the real world,' he reckons.
Another friend, Kat, was convinced Gary would ultimately turn out to be a knife-wielding psycho. My argument was that so could any man you get off with when you're half-cut at closing time. And most people I know have gone out on a date with someone they have no recollection of except for some drunken tongue action at a kebab shop. How safe is that?
Then there's the issue of men pretending to be women, or young 'uns pretending to be old enough to legally have sex when in fact they aren't even grown enough to get on the rides at Disney. Well, that's all the more reason to meet up with people, I say. At least you get to put their talk to the test.
Only my pal Jenny was supportive, probably because she'd been scouring the same site as me for a normal-looking bloke. Admittedly we both encountered a lot of people who managed to display horrendous personality disorders in just a couple of messages. But we came to the conclusion that if we were doing it, and we're perfectly normal and reasonably attractive women, then cyberspace can't just be full of complete losers.
So how was my first internet date? A lady should never tell, but the fact that Gary had some fantastic sauvignon back at his place and a gorgeous twinkle in his eyes made it all worthwhile.
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