Being dumped can be good for you

There\'s no doubt about it, getting the elbow sucks. It\'s hard to see there\'s hope on the horizon through those swollen, tear-streaked peepers… but, be cheered! We spoke to 10 happy ladies who realised that their exes did them a surprisingly big favour…

(Names have been changed to protect the innocent!)

Kick up your heels

Sarah took herself off travelling after finding Jed, her boyfriend of two years, in bed with a good friend. \"It was so obvious, really. He\'d been acting weirdly for a few months before it happened. When the dust cleared I realised that, for the first time, I could focus on what I wanted – so I took myself off backpacking. I made some fantastic friends in New Zealand while working on an organic farm and I\'m saving up to go back. Being around such nice people restored my faith in humanity after his betrayal.\"

Be your own boss

Says Jenny: \"I was all set to marry my one-and-only serious boyfriend when, a couple of months before the wedding, he got cold feet and dumped me. A year on, I\'m over the worst and am finally enjoying my misspent youth! Being single\'s great - I\'m totally my own boss and having great fun flirting with all those gorgeous guys out there. Last I heard, he\'s proposed to someone else – with all this fun I\'m having, I don\'t see myself settling down any time soon!\"

Baby blues

Anna, 31, has finally found the man she feels right with – and she has her ex to thank for it… \"Mark and I had been trying for a baby for over 18 months and we were rowing constantly as the stress built up. He dumped me after a massive argument, saying that he never wanted a baby in the first place. I\'ve since fallen in love with a great guy I met through a work friend and I\'ve just found out I\'m pregnant after only six months of seeing him. It was a total accident and the last thing on our minds, but we feel so calm and happy. Everything has fallen into place – both of us know we\'ve found \'the one\'.\"

Getting to the truth

\"Tom and I had been together for three years but we both knew it wasn\'t going anywhere,\" says Jane, 24. \"We were great mates but there was no spark left between us. He finished with me a few weeks before I went on holiday with some mates to Greece. One of the girls in the group was gay – and I realised I fancied her. We got really close and have been together ever since. A year on, I\'ve realised Tom felt more like a brother than a boyfriend. I\'m grateful to him for ending it – now I feel comfortable in my own skin at last.\"

Take charge

Naomi, 35, used to run a restaurant with her ex. \"He was always showing off, flirting with the waitresses and customers while I was stuck out the back doing all the hard graft. I blew my top one day and told him he took me for granted; he told me where to stick the relationship so I called his bluff and walked out. Two years on, I\'m running my own beach-front coffee shop and have finally realised that I\'m more than capable of doing it on my own. I love being in charge - and I\'m great at it!\"

Barcelona babes

Debbie\'s relationship with Steve had gone stale after they\'d moved in together… \"It was very safe and boring. We never went out, just cuddled up on the sofa every night. It all got shook up after I went off on a hen holiday in Barcleona - and had a two-night fling with a rather gorgeous guy. I felt so guilty, I told Steve about the affair. He was really hurt and finished it. I regret upsetting him but am now so much happier; I feel as if a weight has been lifted. I realise now that I was really depressed before. And I\'m thinking of going back to Barcelona!\"

Realise your own ambitions

Simone fulfilled a life-long ambition after Nick finished with her. \"Nick\'s career as a lawyer always came first. I was a nursery nurse and felt quite uninspired by work - I\'d always dreamed of being an actor after doing tons of plays at university. Nick got a new job which meant moving to Scotland and he just assumed I\'d agree to go too. I bit the bullet and told him I wanted to audition for drama school in London. He asked me to make a choice and couldn\'t handle it when I chose to stay in London. After a year and a half of trying, I\'m finally starting drama school in September. I feel like I\'ve had a new lease of life and am finally back in the driving seat.\"

Feeling underappreciated?

Mandy, 26, always had a thing for her boyfriend Pete\'s cousin. \"Ed would often pop round to watch football or hang out with Pete and his mates at the house. We hit it off so well – we\'ve got exactly the same sense of humour. Pete was getting more and more distant – always off down the pub or working late. One day he came home drunk and told me Ed had said he took me for granted – and he went on to admit to me he wasn\'t in love with me any more. He finished it that night. Ed and I ended up getting together – it\'s a bit awkward between him and Pete but things are moving quickly and it feels so great to be with someone who treats me so well.\"

The best revenge

Jude was gutted when Phil, her boyfriend of three years, dumped her unceremoniously for a girl he met in a club. \"She was super-skinny and pretty stunning. I felt so depressed at first, then bitter, and finally, totally furious. But I\'ve got my best revenge now! I went to a personal trainer, toned up, had a haircut and totally changed my image. I saw him in a bar last week and his jaw hit the floor. Best bit was, I didn\'t care any more – I\'d done it to make myself feel better, not for anyone else\'s benefit.\"

Get R-E-S-P-E-C-T!

\"I moved in with Dan, who was 10 years older than me, for eight months,\" says Ellie. \"He was always telling me I didn\'t know how to run my life, moaning that he had to pay for everything as I was still studying, and telling me that I could never survive on my own. I got so sick of it that, after a huge row, I told him I didn\'t want to be with him because he was a bully. He told me to leave – and I think he was pretty shocked when I did. He tried to get back with me for months but I\'ve now met a gorgeous man on an internet dating site (they do work!) who treats me the way I deserve to be treated – with respect and awe! He even buys me flowers!\"