According to a survey conducted by everydaysale.co.uk, 43% of us Brits would have a holiday fling if the opportunity arose. Only 43% we thought? Someone's been telling porkies. Who hasn't dreamed of lying on the sand, warm waves lapping at our feet while some hunk of love foreigner who we can barely communicate with lavishes attention upon our lithe, tanned body (we're dreaming so we're allowed to look like a supermodel!) But if you are single and looking for love, or at the very least, lust this summer there are a few precautions you should take.
Pairs or small groups of women travelling together can cause quite a stir with the locals. Flirty waiters and bar staff who have obviously seen one too many episodes of Brits Abroad may think all single women on holiday are up for casual sex and our polite British manners can often be misinterpreted as an open invitation to something far from wholesome.
On a recent trip to Turkey a single friend and her equally single companion were overwhelmed by the attention from the male waiting staff. What started off as an amusing scenario resulting in the best table at dinner every night turned slightly more sinister when they refused an invitation to join a few of the men for drinks after their shift had ended near midnight. For the rest of the holiday the staff in question refused to serve them or served them in silence after telling them they were very angry with them. One man even asked the ladies if they had boyfriends. When they replied no, he asked, 'why not? Are you lez?' In hindsight the ladies wished they had pretended to be in the throes of a Sapphic love affair as it would have saved them from the completely inappropriate wandering hands of the men working the sun loungers.
Now if you are looking for some summer fun and by fun we mean sex then you might well be tempted to join the locals for drinks but you wouldn't just go off with a stranger at home without leaving message of where you were going and who you were going with, so why do it abroad? This is an extremely dangerous situation and we don't want to scaremonger as we're sure nine times out of ten you'll have a fab night, lose a shoe and gain an orgasm but what if you're the unlucky one? No-one will know where you are; you won't be familiar with your surroundings and possibly won't speak a word of the language and are therefore in a very vulnerable situation. So think twice. If you do decide to go, leave word at the reception desk and leave your number and ask if they will call at a designated time to make sure you are OK. Also ask for a number of a respected local cab firm and take enough money to get back safely. And need we remind you to take a condom? I hope not.
We are all aware of the dangers of not using a condom and when sober we often choose the sensible safer sex option but one too many buckets of sangria later and you're riding bareback like you're the star attraction at a rodeo. Need we list the horrors that might infiltrate your knickers should you do this? Herpes, gonorrhoea, chlamydia, crabs and more nasty infections that will leave your bits looking less than lovely at best and could leave you infertile at worst. So perhaps leave that last tequila shot on the bar and remain sober enough to remember to slide on a condom.
For some, bringing home a comedy sombrero and some distinctly bad tan lines is enough, for others a night of unbridled passion with Luis the lothario from Latin America results in bringing home a baby too. Needless to say, this is not good practice but just how do you work out when to take your pill when you've just flown across three continents and had no sleep? Well, if you want to make things really simple keep a watch on 'home' time and take your tablets as usual although be aware that a dodgy tummy, whether caused by something you've eaten or more likely all the alcohol you've consumed, will hamper the pill's effectiveness so for the ultimate in caution why not use condoms as well?
Now the lecture's over, remember to enjoy yourself. After all, one devilishly hot night of (safe) sex with a tanned, muscle-bound man you'll never see again will make for a fantastic tale for the girls back home and will probably do you more good than two weeks in Mauritius.
