There's no doubt about it – good sex is one of life's great pleasures. And part of that pleasure comes from the knowledge that sex between you and your partner is absolutely safe – whether it's a passion-filled one-night stand or part of a committed relationship.
Safe sex isn't just about avoiding pregnancy; rates of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) have ballooned by over fifty per cent in the past decade. One common myth that contributes to this is that we seem to (wrongly) believe that any STD can be cured with a short course of pills. Nice idea, maybe, but simply not the case. Want to know more about STDs? See your STD FAQs answered here.
There is no cure for genital herpes, for example; once you are infected you have it for life. Chlamydia, on the other hand, is fairly straightforward to treat. But in women it's often symptom-less and if left undiagnosed can seriously affect fertility.
Don't think it will happen to you? Well, there are thousands of other women in Britain who thought the same – and lived to regret it. It's an attitude that has no doubt helped contribute to the fact that the UK transmission rate for the HIV virus is now higher between heterosexuals than it is between men who have sex with other men.
Getting safe
Fortunately, practising safe sex is relatively easy – the most important thing, to paraphrase the Boy Scout motto, is to Be Prepared. Stock up on the following Weapons for Safe Sexual Amusement and keep them ready for action:
Condoms
The safe sex staple – but only use with water-based lubricants. Oil-based lubricants such as baby oil or Vaseline weaken the latex, making it more likely to tear. Remember, the stronger the condom, the better the protection – particularly important if you enjoy vigorous sex or anal penetration.
Femidoms
The female condom puts you in the driving seat. Stronger than traditional condoms, femidoms can be inserted up to eight hours before sex – making them less of an, ahem, interruption to events.
Dental dams
It's not just penetrative sex that needs to be safe. Place one of these latex strips over the genitals and/or anus during oral sex. If you don't have one to hand, a condom cut to size works well.
Gloves
Consider using latex gloves during internal vaginal or anal foreplay. They provide barrier protection and keep you both safe from sharp nails or jewellery.
Staying safe
It's not enough to play at safe sex, it's important to do it properly. Using the same condom when progressing from fellatio to vaginal sex might be acceptable, but doing the same for anal to vaginal penetration, for example, is not. Common STDs such as gonorrhea, syphilis and herpes can affect the anus – not to mention that intestinal parasites can also be passed this way. Likewise, if you're using sex toys with a partner, employ a condom and be sure to change it for each act (from vaginal to anal penetration, say, or between the two of you).
All sound too much like hard work? Well, get used to it. Forget 'better safe than sorry', it's better to be safe than infected (or, indeed, sterile or dead). Once you get used to incorporating protection into your sexual repertoire, you'll discover that doing so is easy – it can even be fun.
Alternatively, if you're in a committed relationship you might want to consider going for a full STD check-up together. Nothing beats the thrill (sexual or otherwise!) of starting with a clean slate together.
See more sexual health advice on handbag.com
