New app counts loud moans and thrusts to decide if you're good in bed

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If you need an app to work out how good you are in bed, here's your answer

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Want to know if you're really good in bed? A new app claims to have the answer as it records all your sexual performances, rates them and gives users a verdict.

Called Spreadsheets, the app measures how load people wail during the deed, and on average how many thrusts a minute are made.

Well, with the revelation that 20% of people use their phones during sex - it was only a matter of time until this happened.

According to the app's website, users will 'find out how many thrusts per minute you're averaging, how long you go for, and exactly how loud it gets. Keep a record of your encounters, date, time, and performance.'

Using an accelerometer and microphone, the app provides 'statistical and visual analysis' of the user's performance, but it promises it does not record or playback audio or video.

But wait, there's more.

The app has been designed to encourage porn star style jack-rabbit sex as the loader the moans and the more thrusts people manage helps to unlocks achievements. You can even share these with your mates if you so choose. Now doesn't that sound like fun?

Scream louder if you want to go faster ladies.



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