Fancy a 20 minute orgasm? Here's the Pleasure Professor's Tantric Sex Guide

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Expand your sexual thrills this Valentine's Day with some 'expansion of energy'

Man Kissing Woman

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Sex therapist Louise Van der Velde - also known as the Pleasure Professor - knows a thing or too about making sex special. Luckily, she's also a bit of a Tantric sex master with plenty of helpful advice to share.

In her latest book Decent Proposal: Divine secrets from the Pleasure Professor, she admits, "I have been enjoying Tantra for years - it allows me to experience multiple orgasms lasting 20 minutes each. It can work for you, too."

Sound too good to be true? Take a look at Louise's top advice below...

What is Tantric sex?

It is a Hindu practice dating back more than 5,000 years. Tantra means 'the weaving and expansion of energy', which encapsulates an entire body of divine teaching going back centuries. Put simply, it is a slow form of sex that increases intimacy and creates a mind-body connection which can lead to more powerful and prolonged orgasms.

How do you do it?

The key is not to focus too closely on your orgasm. Instead prolong the foreplay for as long as possible before taking sex to its natural end. Delaying orgasm can be difficult for some people, particularly men - but it can be done using a variety of techniques including meditation, breathing exercises and massage.

There are 10 key steps to Tantric bliss...

1. Get some scented candles, turn off your phone and prepare to devote at least two hours to your lover.

2. Loosen your body: Tantra is about moving energy through the body, so shake your limbs vigorously to energise and unblock your system before you start.

3. Stay off the bed. This will trigger the sleep button in your brain. Tantra is not about a quick romp - you are seeking a deep connection. Get comfortable by lying on the floor with your partner using some cushions.

4. Stimulate the senses. Sight is the most powerful of the senses so it's important you look good. Wear some sexy lingerie, and decorate the room with some fresh flowers. Use oils like rose, ylang-ylang and jasmine to stimulate your nose, whisper dirty talk in your partner's ear and make sure there are tasty treats on hand like melted chocolate, honey and fresh fruit. Finally, massage the head, neck, hands and feet to make your sense of touch go wild.

5. Now get even more intimate. Sit face-to-face - with the woman on the man's lap if this is comfortable. Wrap your hands tightly around each other and press your bodies against each other. This kind of skin contact promotes greater feelings of intimacy.

6. Let the foreplay become more intimate. Take your time and leisurely make your way around their body. Try a variety of touches - firm massage, light feathery touches, and gentle stroking. The aim here is to heighten your lover's senses in a slow and intense way so that you're building them up to a peak but stopping just short before the orgasm. Oral sex now is fine - but not to the point of climax. We are aiming to make the pleasure last for hours.

7. Now stand up opposite each other. Look in each other's eyes - place your left hand on your partner's heart. He should do the same to you. Match each other's breathing for at least two minutes.

8. Try some role play - use a blindfold. Take it turns:one should be submissive and one dominant.

9. Progress beyond foreplay to intercourse. Avoid any position that you know makes you orgasm easily. Work towards a gradual build-up of pleasure. The slower you take it, the more intense the orgasm will be at the end.

10. As you are both reaching orgasm, slow your breathing down. This will seem illogical - most of us breath more quickly as we approach climax. Women, in particular, can tense up at this stage of sex as they try to make themselves come. Instead relax your tummy and take long, slow deep breaths - your orgasm will last longer and be more intense.

P.S. Don't give up: If you don't last beyond 10 minutes, try again. Tantric sex takes time to get to grips with because we're all used to sex in a Western way - this means we expect sex to have an obvious start, middle and end. Use your imagination and your sex life can go off in all sorts of new directions. That's Tantra!

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