'Sin Tropez' author Aita Ighodaro reveals a new way to decipher his post-date texts

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Confused daters can now decode messages with help from social forum Hetexted.com...

Love hearts

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The takeover of electronic communication has made the already vexing field of relationships even harder to navigate. Men are terrible liars, which means that most of the time if they send you a 'Okay, nice to meet you' message they're probably not interested.

But that's the problem with post-date texts - they're easy to obsess about, pour over and debate until the amount of Xs at the end becomes an issue of national importance.

A single text message saying 'nobody has ever made me feel this way' can ping onto the screens of 10 different phones all at once, causing 10 once sane women to go into dating meltdown.

Even more tricky to work out is the silent male. Why hasn't he texted? He could be too shy to get in touch or fully say what he's thinking. He might be lazy, arrogant or a 'grunter' who just hasn't evolved past guttural noises to develop proper communication skills.

Whatever the reason, Aita Ighodaro, author of Sin Tropez and All That Glitters believes that all men like to shift the responsibility of effective communication onto the recipient, rather than deal with it themselves.

Aita recommends a brand spanking new website called Hetexted.com, which provides a forum for women to post their unsatisfactory or confusing exchanges with potential lovers, and then 'crowdsource' objective advice from readers.

These readers can decide whether "he's into you", "he's not into you", "verdict's still out" or even post a comment with a more detailed analysis of your predicament. LOL.

In theory this website, which helped to inspire Aita's latest rom-com novel All That Glitters, is exactly what we're crying out for, given the amount of time we spend 'mulling over' each text.

All That Glitters


But it also begs the question; is it possible for other people's advice to be valid when only you (presumably) have met the person and know the full context of the romance so far?

Consider the following text message: 'Can't make tonight got 2 c my sis.' Err…So that's a he's not into you, right?

Now consider the same message with the knowledge that sis is in labour and hours from giving birth to her first child. Suddenly the judgement changes. Like many seemingly great ideas, the reality often becomes messier and more complicated.

Perhaps we'd have more luck communicating if we took our interaction with potential mates as a whole, rather than picking apart small elements of it, such as individual text messages.

Better to ask, how do I feel generally when I'm with him? Happy? Relaxed? Insecure? That's something only you can answer and will tell you a lot more than 500 people on Hetexted.com ever could.

What do you think about hetexted.com? Is it a useful website or will it just confuse things further?

All That Glitters, £6.39, amazon.co.uk.

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