Atkins Diet: a two-week diary

Louise Newman takes the plunge and tries the Atkins Diet for two weeks. Keep reading to find out how she got on..

It's 11 months and two weeks since I got married and our first anniversary is looming. Though I've been in denial for several months, the horrible truth is that if we tried to re-enact the Big Day I'd have to have a big dress to go with it.

Married life does not involve scratching around in the fridge for semi-edible items at midnight when you've finally crawled home from the pub, but eating lovely home-cooked meals accompanied by even lovelier wine. Cosy evenings in with my man and his Jamie Oliver cookbook have invariably led to fewer trips to the gym and the arrival of some unwelcome flesh.

So, not being the svelte bride I once was - and wanting a quick fix - I decided to take action in the form of that Hollywood favourite, the Atkins diet, to try to lose 7lbs in two weeks. The idea is that you consume lots of protein and loads of fat, but very few carbohydrates.

You cannot have pasta, bread, potatoes, rice, caffeine, fruit, sugar or alcohol, and selected vegetables are allowed in moderation. After a few days, the body is supposed to go into 'ketosis', a state in which having not received any energy-giving carbs, it begins to burn your existing fat, at quite a rate of knots.

The first two weeks of this diet are fairly drastic, after which you gradually add more carbs, until you are able to eat more but remain in ketosis.

Week one

Day 1

Kicked off with fried eggs and bacon, tomato and parsley - something I only have about twice a year. Didn't feel good; I prefer fruit, yogurt - anything else. Felt thirsty for the entire day and by 9pm was so exhausted I was incapable of doing anything other than lying on the sofa like a corpse, tolerating husband's football-watching activities (very out of character). Went to bed two hours earlier than usual.

Day 2

Steak and eggs for breakfast was filling but failed to promote much energy. Ate chicken and salad for lunch, but watching my nieces eat potatoes was torture. Though I don't feel hungry, I also don't feel satisfied. Tried to buy 'sugar substitute' used in recipes in the Atkins book but no one seems to know what it is. Craving for wine overcame me in the evening and I wickedly consumed one small and delicious glass of chablis.

Day 3

Felt marginally more energised but after yet more eggs and bacon for breakfast, went to gym where I put in a pathetic performance. Lifting any weight was a gargantuan task. Couldn't match my usual performance and worked out very inefficiently. Later watched friends eating ice-cream and the desire for something sweet or with a starchy texture was overwhelming. Terrible sinning: drank two glasses of white wine. Does this mean the diet won't work?

Day 4
Awoke feeling very odd: unusually irritable and limbs feeling lead-like. Too early to face beastly bacon and eggs again so started day with large lump of cheese. Feel guilty about last night's wine. If the wine causes the diet not to work, shall be of whale-like proportions within two weeks. Should by now be 'in ketosis'. A friend says this makes you smell weird - which I don't.

Day 5

A roast dinner at my parents' consisted of lamb and... two bits of broccoli. No Yorkshire pud, no root veg, no wonderful-looking roast potatoes, and no fun. My mum later offered me an exciting ham snack, but when I scrutinised the packaging it contained sugar. While driving home I felt like I might nod off at any minute; my brain seems to be functioning as inefficiently as my body. This Atkins diet cannot be good for you.

Day 6

Went to the gym and weighed myself for the first time in five days. The scales claimed I had lost 4lbs, but the cynic in me says I was once a plum and am now a prune. If carbohydrates assist you in storing fluid, then that - and the fact that my fat seems perfectly intact - must mean that I am merely dehydrated. Thirst persists and even walking up the stairs seems like a huge effort. This evening, steak smothered in Roquefort and butter perked me up a little.

Day 7

Some meals or snacks seem to be followed by an unpleasant palpitation-like sensation. It doesn't last long, but is not dissimilar to climbing steep stairs while in Atkins mode; not easy and not pleasant. Feel that a couple more weeks of this and a heart attack could well be on the cards. However, I have completely stopped eating between meals because who wants to snack on a lump of meat?

Week two

Day 8

Have become terrified of what might happen if I OD'd on carbohydrates - well, in the minimal way that it would be possible to OD while on this diet. I may quickly become like Gwyneth Paltrow in Shallow Hal. Lots of fat and few carbs seems like a dangerous game to play in more ways than one.

Day 9

Underwent a dental procedure that prevented me from eating anything other than white food for 24 hours. The only Atkins-friendly ingredients I came up with were cod and cottage cheese! Appetising... not!

Day 10

More cottage cheese for breakfast. My teeth look great but I feel quite dreadful - absolutely no energy. Went to gym and spent more time lying on a mat than anything else. Now I know how awful malnutrition can make you feel. Cannot understand how anyone could stick at this diet for very long.

Day 11

Back to eggs and bacon, which is marginally more satisfying than cottage cheese. Had burger for lunch, which, when the bun and chips were removed, was enough to sustain a three year old. Everyone keeps asking me: 'But what does it do to your bowels?' Well, nothing, actually. All goes on as normal.

Day 12

Sun has come out, so optimistically try on honeymoon shorts. No, they still won't encompass my posterior. Curse Dr Atkins. Am amazed that I have lasted 12 days with no sugar - a first. In view of not being able to find any sugar substitute, I have been eating flaked almonds with cream instead of a dessert. Not a dish I'd recommend.

Day 13

My skin is looking pretty rough and is unbelievably greasy, but as compensation my weight seems to have plummeted by 6lbs. Chicken roasted in oil and butter is far nicer than that done in water, but it will all be over tomorrow. The last night of gorging on fat-laden runny Camembert!

Day 14

Time's up, my jeans are looser, my appetite has seriously dwindled and I now know it is possible to survive without sugar. I remain 6lbs lighter than I was two weeks ago, but I'm not convinced that it's not all fluid-loss.

One week later...

The cynic in me wasn't entirely wrong. One sniff of a potato and I piled on 3lbs, but I have genuinely lost the other 3lbs. However, had I stopped snacking and drinking and cut out sugar and seriously starchy items, I reckon I would have still lost the weight without making myself feel quite so ill.

I have now discovered that Splenda, a sugar substitute of the type used in the Atkins diet recipes, is available in most major supermarkets.

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