I'm feeling really pissed off with my friend but I want to know if I am overreacting or not (overtired, hungry and PMSy being possible factors if I am overreacting).
One of our friends is getting married next year and me and my friend have to book a hotel for it now. My engaged friend rang me the other day to insist we book asap because local hotels around the wedding venue are getting booked up quick due to something else happening in the town on the same weekend, she asked me to discuss with my friend who was sharing with who so we could get it sorted. Apparently the family rooms can sleep up to 4 or you can have a double which sleeps 2. My engaged friend suggested me and my friend could still share if she brought her boyfriend to the wedding and if by that time I am with someone, I could also, without it affecting the room we'd booked if we booked a family room. My friend is rarely home and doesn't communicate well by phone so I usually text her or send emails instead. I emailed her telling her about the room situation and said if her boyfriend comes and if I have someone by the wedding we could still share a room and save money.
I read the reply today and she said she told our engaged friend that I would probably be bringing the guy I like at the mo by then (highly unlikely as this guy would never go and my friend and engaged friend know already so makes no sense why she would even say that) and that her and her boyfriend were going to get a double room. No mention of the family room or an apology or explanation to say she would prefer to share a room with just her boyfriend.
I replied saying that even if I was with that guy by then he would never go (which as I already mentioned she is well aware of as she knows how anti-social he is). Then I said so basically I have to pay for a room all to myself (with a ? on the end).
I am annoyed that she didn't even acknowledge the family room idea even if it was to just say no I'd prefer to do this instead... It comes across that she hasn't even considered that it's going to cost me more paying for a room to myself whereas if it were the other way round it would be all she'd be concerned about! I find it a little selfish on her part. If it were the other way round I would've made sure she was ok getting a room to herself or discussed it with her fully. I probably would have even let her share a room with me even if I had a bloke because I don't like the thought of someone being left on their own.
The not wanting to share a room also makes me think I will be left on my own over the whole weekend as she will be spending the whole time with her boyfriend like she normally does. The wedding is over 2 days and so I expect she will go out with him during the day and it won't even cross her mind that I will be left to myself the whole time. I don't have anyone to bring with me to the wedding and I didn't think I would have to worry about being left on my own before now!
Am I overreacting or would you be a bit pissed off too?
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Am I right to be annoyed with my friend?
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I've just spoken to my engaged friend and she said she told my friend to share with me when she spoke to her a few days ago!
Blimey !!
Don't cha just love weddings ?? !!!
Honestly, they seem to turn even the sanest of people into complete nutters !! And you guys are still a year away !!!
Just relax abit about it all. And as said, try actually talking to each other, not through other friends. Its way off, so just book the family room - then, see what happens nearer the time - no big deal.
Don't cha just love weddings ?? !!!
Honestly, they seem to turn even the sanest of people into complete nutters !! And you guys are still a year away !!!
Just relax abit about it all. And as said, try actually talking to each other, not through other friends. Its way off, so just book the family room - then, see what happens nearer the time - no big deal.
Well dang, I found my original profile and sign in ! Tis me !
I may not always be right.... but I'm never wrong.
I may not always be right.... but I'm never wrong.
Hmm, playing devil's advocate maybe your friend honestly believed that you might be bringing your boyfriend? With it being more than a 1 day event?
Also, I can understand her wanting to share with her boyfriend (weddings and alcohol can make ya feel a bit frisky!!)
But yes, I can understand if you are a bit frustrated if you thought you would be sharing a room, really the two of you should be speaking to each other to figure out sleeping arrangements rather than other people.
Hope this helps and makes sense.
Also, I can understand her wanting to share with her boyfriend (weddings and alcohol can make ya feel a bit frisky!!)
But yes, I can understand if you are a bit frustrated if you thought you would be sharing a room, really the two of you should be speaking to each other to figure out sleeping arrangements rather than other people.
Hope this helps and makes sense.
ahh mate i know where you are coming from, do you feel a bit rejected and ignored? theres a slight arrogance in her actions, that if you were sensitive to it or have noticed it before off her could reallly grate
screw her and screw her almost undetectable but still there hoighty toityness
youve made a few assumptions too but nothing that a courteous reaction from her wouldnt be brushed aside and forgotten very quickly. Things like this can only get to you if you allow it to get to you. Its slightly passive aggressive of her, but dont react to negative with negative as the only person whos feeling hurt is you, so you are the one whos coming off worse
have a hug and ill let ya give me a mild chinese burn as a treat
screw her and screw her almost undetectable but still there hoighty toityness
youve made a few assumptions too but nothing that a courteous reaction from her wouldnt be brushed aside and forgotten very quickly. Things like this can only get to you if you allow it to get to you. Its slightly passive aggressive of her, but dont react to negative with negative as the only person whos feeling hurt is you, so you are the one whos coming off worse
have a hug and ill let ya give me a mild chinese burn as a treat
<span style="font-size:10px;" class="Apple-style-span"><span style="font-size:14px;" class="Apple-style-span"><span style="color:#000080;" class="Apple-style-span">"I'm not selling you my baby Nato."<
Quoted:
Things sound as though they have gotten overly complicated by not just picking up the phone and discussing what the arrangements would be (and leaving the bride to be out of it). Personally, I wouldnt want to share a room with another couple whether it was to save costs or not. Especially over a 2 day period, their bound to get frisky and it is just plain awkward. If it were me and my bf and a friend was going along too, I wouldnt even suggest a family room, unless it would be two rooms adjoined rather than you all being in the same room. Its such an invasion of privacy and I dont think any of my friends would suggest it to me anyway. However I probably would have handled it differently and directly said that its a no go. If I were paying to be away somewhere with my bf then chances are we would want to take advantage of being away and treat it as a mini break with a wedding incorporated. I also dont think its selfish to do that but should have initially been expected. Two's company and all that. I dont think you should worry about spending the day doing other activities. Weddings bring people together. You will surely know or come to know other people who are staying as well. Does the hotel have any facilities that you could make use of to pass the time? Iv stayed in many hotels alone (for work reasons though) and often make use of doing some sightseeing/ shopping/ exercise etc around the time I have. Try not to feel so frustrated about it, its not easy I know but I think you need to let it drop and not see it as a barrier to spending time with your friend at the wedding.
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Nato, I do feel a bit rejected and ignored, I try not to say anything about how I feel though because I don't want to be needy. I will try not to be negative. Thanks for the hug and letting me give you a chinese burn!
The wedding will be in Coventry about 4 hours away from where I live. It's a sikh wedding so there will be a party the night before the wedding on the saturday and then the ceremony on the sunday and then another party afterwards. The first party starts at 5pm so I might try to get there near that time so I just get ready and go to the party, think the ceremony the next day is going to be at 12pm so doesn't look like there will be much time for much else anyway. Not really sure about what else will be happening as the bride-to-be didn't know how sikh weddings worked before she had to start planning and her family told her! She has to leave behind all her things she had before the wedding because it's meant to be bad luck to have them after so wedding gifts will be including a lot of things for the bride as she won't have any clothes! I'm going to try to forget about being on my own and concentrate on being excited about watching my friend getting married (I think I'll probably well up at the ceremony)!
Personally, I wouldnt want to share a room with another couple whether it was to save costs or not. Especially over a 2 day period, their bound to get frisky and it is just plain awkward. If it were me and my bf and a friend was going along too, I wouldnt even suggest a family room, unless it would be two rooms adjoined rather than you all being in the same room.
I thought this too tbh.
Little L I went to a wedding last year and we were all staying in the same hotel. When I checked in the receptionist said, "Ah yes you're the single one aren't you?" I may as well have booked me gin, cats and cobwebs along with my morning newspaper (/misshaversham)
It was almost funny.
Where is the wedding? Bet there's loads of stuff you can do there.
xx
I thought this too tbh.
Little L I went to a wedding last year and we were all staying in the same hotel. When I checked in the receptionist said, "Ah yes you're the single one aren't you?" I may as well have booked me gin, cats and cobwebs along with my morning newspaper (/misshaversham)
It was almost funny.
Where is the wedding? Bet there's loads of stuff you can do there.
xx
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br />And no, it already being dead isn't much better. You still <br /><br /><font size="6">ATE A MOTH!!</font> <img src="http://community.handbag.com/ve
Things sound as though they have gotten overly complicated by not just picking up the phone and discussing what the arrangements would be (and leaving the bride to be out of it).
Personally, I wouldnt want to share a room with another couple whether it was to save costs or not. Especially over a 2 day period, their bound to get frisky and it is just plain awkward. If it were me and my bf and a friend was going along too, I wouldnt even suggest a family room, unless it would be two rooms adjoined rather than you all being in the same room. Its such an invasion of privacy and I dont think any of my friends would suggest it to me anyway. However I probably would have handled it differently and directly said that its a no go. If I were paying to be away somewhere with my bf then chances are we would want to take advantage of being away and treat it as a mini break with a wedding incorporated. I also dont think its selfish to do that but should have initially been expected. Two's company and all that.
I dont think you should worry about spending the day doing other activities. Weddings bring people together. You will surely know or come to know other people who are staying as well. Does the hotel have any facilities that you could make use of to pass the time? Iv stayed in many hotels alone (for work reasons though) and often make use of doing some sightseeing/ shopping/ exercise etc around the time I have.
Try not to feel so frustrated about it, its not easy I know but I think you need to let it drop and not see it as a barrier to spending time with your friend at the wedding.
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