Hi hopethisworks
You sound just like I did. I had surgery 3 weeks ago to correct this. There are things that you can try before deciding to go down the surgery route. I hade physio at hospital and worked really hard at trying to reawaken my pelvic floor muscles, but nothing I tried would work so I was referred for surgery.
Let me know if you want any info about the treatments I had and if I can help you with any questions, I will try. I am not a doctor but a 36 year old woman with children who has been down this path.