Your oppotunity to add to the poll anonymously and or leave an opinion.
Marina:)
FORUMS
FORUM RSS
Routines feeding/ sleeping
Author
Message
<p><br /><img id="ctl00_main_ctlTicker_imgPreviewTop" style="border-width:0px;" src="http://global.thebump.com/tools/tickers/TickerTicker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=29&CT=&CG=F&O=
Basically i'm feeling torn now my other half wants our baby in a routine i've been whinning for some time now that he makes no effort in our relationship to keep us tight and we havent had sex since neave was 5 weeks old.
After speaking to my mother in law (because i dont have a mommy) she said that neave should be in her own room and sleeping earlier by now this would give us more time to ourselves. Out of the 3 friends i have that had babies the same time two run regimented routines and one doesnt the one who doesnt has a grumpy baby an she is always moaning that shes tired while the other two are very happy but one won't shift an once from her routine so we never see her and she wont come out after 7pm.
I'm happy with my care of Neave and i am happy that shes growing and healthy. My bug is with my partner he doesnt really care for neave in the evening when he comes home he kinda just plays with her. I do 90% of the childcare on top of that i do all the baths and bed times.
Marina:)
After speaking to my mother in law (because i dont have a mommy) she said that neave should be in her own room and sleeping earlier by now this would give us more time to ourselves. Out of the 3 friends i have that had babies the same time two run regimented routines and one doesnt the one who doesnt has a grumpy baby an she is always moaning that shes tired while the other two are very happy but one won't shift an once from her routine so we never see her and she wont come out after 7pm.
I'm happy with my care of Neave and i am happy that shes growing and healthy. My bug is with my partner he doesnt really care for neave in the evening when he comes home he kinda just plays with her. I do 90% of the childcare on top of that i do all the baths and bed times.
Marina:)
<p><br /><img id="ctl00_main_ctlTicker_imgPreviewTop" style="border-width:0px;" src="http://global.thebump.com/tools/tickers/TickerTicker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=29&CT=&CG=F&O=
we kindof have a routine for Amelie, she settled into it herself and we just follow it, works out brilliantly at the moment 
She always goes to bed at half 7 and she wakes up at half 7 in the morning. no wakes up in the night, She's been in her own room since 7 weeks and has slept through since.
she has a bottle every 4 hours in the day and plays and naps in between. she doesnt have a set napping time in the day, i asked the health visitor and she said it was only necessary if it helped me. But i dont mind her sleeping whenever.
She always goes to bed at half 7 and she wakes up at half 7 in the morning. no wakes up in the night, She's been in her own room since 7 weeks and has slept through since.
she has a bottle every 4 hours in the day and plays and naps in between. she doesnt have a set napping time in the day, i asked the health visitor and she said it was only necessary if it helped me. But i dont mind her sleeping whenever.
We followed this route neave found her own routine and it was great but shes not sleeping any longer at night. Shes still only sleeping about 9 hours at night. She has a quick nap in the morning and a slightly longer one in the afternoon thats 30 mins and 2 hours respectively.
She seems perfectly normal and happy on that amount of sleep, i've tried doing everything i can to get her to go to bed earlier but short of shutting her alone in her room and leaving her there there not much else i can do.
We do need more adult time but not at the expense of my daughter whilst shes vunerable.
Any ideas?
Marina:)
She seems perfectly normal and happy on that amount of sleep, i've tried doing everything i can to get her to go to bed earlier but short of shutting her alone in her room and leaving her there there not much else i can do.
We do need more adult time but not at the expense of my daughter whilst shes vunerable.
Any ideas?
Marina:)
<p><br /><img id="ctl00_main_ctlTicker_imgPreviewTop" style="border-width:0px;" src="http://global.thebump.com/tools/tickers/TickerTicker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=29&CT=&CG=F&O=
Hi Marina,
Is Neave crawling yet? I ask this because Alex is a few weeks older than Neave and after a rocky couple of months sleep, he seems to be totally wearing himself out these days and going to bed earlier and earlier. It didn't happen immediately he started crawling, but we've been seeing a definite trend over the last week or two. If Neave does something similar then you might soon find you get a natural opportunity to get her into an earlier bedtime without too much drama.
Hope it all works out - I can sympathise with the need for adult time. I'm actually going out with my OH on Friday night for the first time in about 3 months!!
Sunnie x
Is Neave crawling yet? I ask this because Alex is a few weeks older than Neave and after a rocky couple of months sleep, he seems to be totally wearing himself out these days and going to bed earlier and earlier. It didn't happen immediately he started crawling, but we've been seeing a definite trend over the last week or two. If Neave does something similar then you might soon find you get a natural opportunity to get her into an earlier bedtime without too much drama.
Hope it all works out - I can sympathise with the need for adult time. I'm actually going out with my OH on Friday night for the first time in about 3 months!!
Sunnie x
Can you try bringing her time forward ten minutes or even 5 minutes each day?
Ilana had got herself into a kind of routine but it's gone mad lately (teething or growth spurt or something). I tried getting her into a routine for napping etc but found it really stressful. Now I just watch her for signs she's tired and try to get her to nap then. The only thing I try to stick to is her bedtime 'routine' or bath and feed and bed but it doesn't always work lately as she's a monkey at the mo.
Ilana had got herself into a kind of routine but it's gone mad lately (teething or growth spurt or something). I tried getting her into a routine for napping etc but found it really stressful. Now I just watch her for signs she's tired and try to get her to nap then. The only thing I try to stick to is her bedtime 'routine' or bath and feed and bed but it doesn't always work lately as she's a monkey at the mo.
Yeah shes been cruising and crawling for a good few weeks now, its had no effect on her sleep. We managed to get her down early last ight she went at 9.45pm but was up really early 6.30am it does me no favours being up that early so looks like she can only manage 9 hours on an empty tummy.
Marina:)
Marina:)
<p><br /><img id="ctl00_main_ctlTicker_imgPreviewTop" style="border-width:0px;" src="http://global.thebump.com/tools/tickers/TickerTicker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=29&CT=&CG=F&O=
I know that you've been thinking on this topic for a while... i've already gave my opinion on it.. i'm pro routines but i'm not regimented in it.. you can find a middle ground.
The thing is you seem happy with the routine that you're in with the bairn going to bed late and now your partner is making noises that he would like his evenings back it's understandable that you're going to clash heads over it.
First I would draft him in in the bedtime routine and get him to help if you want the bairn to go to bed earlier... the way you do this now may be fine for the minute but would you be happy still when she's 2 or 3 and having to get up for nursery/school?
Like I said on your other thread.. babys are one thing but toddlers are in a league of their own and you may find it not so easy to crack the bedtime thing when shes able to walk and get out of her room.
I've always done the bedtime routine from the off.. now cory goes into bed at 8.30 awake and willingly and knows that he's there for the night.
Fact is putting everything else aside.. YOU don't want to put the bairn to bed earlier.. you are happy the way things are now and nobodys experiences or what they think are going to change your mind. The only way you can settle this is to talk to your partner and come to a compromise. You want him to start pulling his weight and you need to tell him this as it's irritating when somebody complains that things arn't going the way they want them too but they are not willing to put the time in themselves.
The thing is you seem happy with the routine that you're in with the bairn going to bed late and now your partner is making noises that he would like his evenings back it's understandable that you're going to clash heads over it.
First I would draft him in in the bedtime routine and get him to help if you want the bairn to go to bed earlier... the way you do this now may be fine for the minute but would you be happy still when she's 2 or 3 and having to get up for nursery/school?
Like I said on your other thread.. babys are one thing but toddlers are in a league of their own and you may find it not so easy to crack the bedtime thing when shes able to walk and get out of her room.
I've always done the bedtime routine from the off.. now cory goes into bed at 8.30 awake and willingly and knows that he's there for the night.
Fact is putting everything else aside.. YOU don't want to put the bairn to bed earlier.. you are happy the way things are now and nobodys experiences or what they think are going to change your mind. The only way you can settle this is to talk to your partner and come to a compromise. You want him to start pulling his weight and you need to tell him this as it's irritating when somebody complains that things arn't going the way they want them too but they are not willing to put the time in themselves.
![[http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c136/samemms/3231278360_2c014cd713.jpg]](http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c136/samemms/3231278360_2c014cd713.jpg "http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c136/samemms/3231278360_2c014cd713.jpg")
I know but cut me some slack i have found adjusting to my new role a bit harder than i thought it would be.
Marina:)
Marina:)
<p><br /><img id="ctl00_main_ctlTicker_imgPreviewTop" style="border-width:0px;" src="http://global.thebump.com/tools/tickers/TickerTicker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=29&CT=&CG=F&O=
aw flower I wasn't having a pop.. I was referring to your OH.. if he isn't willing to put the time in on the bedtime thing then he can't moan that she isn't going to bed the time he thinks she is.. that's what I meant.
I'm not claiming to be an expert here but maybe its time she was in her own room, maybe she'd settle easier with less distractions and maybe get a longer sleep at nightime. Am gets put down after shes had her last bottle at half 7, even if shes fast asleep or wide awake, its what the HV told us to do from day 1 so she could learn to settle herself and so far its working. It may take a few nights of tears and tantrums but its got to be better for you all in the long run.
We manage to have a few hours alone each night and too eat tea in peace, I'd say time as a couple is well worth putting the work in. I think you need to give your OH a kick up the bum aswell haha. my OH works 14 hour days sometimes, biut he knows he has to be home to do last bottle and bedtime, and more to the point he enjoys it, its there time together
We manage to have a few hours alone each night and too eat tea in peace, I'd say time as a couple is well worth putting the work in. I think you need to give your OH a kick up the bum aswell haha. my OH works 14 hour days sometimes, biut he knows he has to be home to do last bottle and bedtime, and more to the point he enjoys it, its there time together
Well tried so hard last night. I'm not a soft touch i fed her early very much to her protest, finished off with a nice warm bottle and then i took her upstairs it was just before half 8 when i started. She was in her jammies and falling asleep so i thought bingo took her upstairs and she was conked out by 8.48. Asleep in her cot in the dark with no noise we were downstairs watching a DVD, its the first time we have used the monitors that we got over a year ago.
However by 11.20pm she was standing up jumping up and down in her cot and actually grabbed the monitor and threw it which was my first indication she was up. I didnt know what to do then i did try and sit with her calm her but she was UP. What do i do about that?
Marina:)
However by 11.20pm she was standing up jumping up and down in her cot and actually grabbed the monitor and threw it which was my first indication she was up. I didnt know what to do then i did try and sit with her calm her but she was UP. What do i do about that?
Marina:)
<p><br /><img id="ctl00_main_ctlTicker_imgPreviewTop" style="border-width:0px;" src="http://global.thebump.com/tools/tickers/TickerTicker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=29&CT=&CG=F&O=
Well done.. keep it up and she'll get used to that.
When she wakes up and wants up.. just don't get her up.. don't take her out of the cot unless it's an evident nappy change and keep lying her down(rapid return I think?)telling her that it's sleepy time.. don't give in and take her downstairs. Be consistant.. you may get a few rough nights where she will tell you that she's not happy with the situation at all but she will give in as long as your firm and get used to it.
When she wakes up and wants up.. just don't get her up.. don't take her out of the cot unless it's an evident nappy change and keep lying her down(rapid return I think?)telling her that it's sleepy time.. don't give in and take her downstairs. Be consistant.. you may get a few rough nights where she will tell you that she's not happy with the situation at all but she will give in as long as your firm and get used to it.
Unforch i did pick her up and bring her downstairs. I thought it unfair given that she'd had a late start to the day and numerou long naps.
So this morning we got up at 7.30 we played ate and then she napped at 10.50am for two hours fifteen mins and then got up nappy food and more playing then we went out. Got home at 4.15 ish and she had mash and carrots and then a large bottle shortly after a bath and in to her jammies and she was tucked up by 6.38pm.
She has woken since but i sent daddy to lay her back down sounded like her dummy had come out and she couldnt find it which is often the case as she doesnt open her eyes.
We'll see what happens later. Mummy and Daddy have a DVD to watch.
I will add though that i am fecking shattered a late night followed by that early start has wiped me out.
Marina:)
So this morning we got up at 7.30 we played ate and then she napped at 10.50am for two hours fifteen mins and then got up nappy food and more playing then we went out. Got home at 4.15 ish and she had mash and carrots and then a large bottle shortly after a bath and in to her jammies and she was tucked up by 6.38pm.
She has woken since but i sent daddy to lay her back down sounded like her dummy had come out and she couldnt find it which is often the case as she doesnt open her eyes.
We'll see what happens later. Mummy and Daddy have a DVD to watch.
I will add though that i am fecking shattered a late night followed by that early start has wiped me out.
Marina:)
<p><br /><img id="ctl00_main_ctlTicker_imgPreviewTop" style="border-width:0px;" src="http://global.thebump.com/tools/tickers/TickerTicker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=29&CT=&CG=F&O=
Who's online?
You can find us here...
Promotions
MORE FROM HANDBAG
Contact | Privacy | Terms & Conditions | Advertising | Site Map | Popular Forum Threads
Copyright © 2012. Hearst Magazines UK is the trading name of the National Magazine Company, registered in England 112955, and its affiliate company, Handbag.com, which is registered in England 03819979. The companies are registered at 72 Broadwick Street, London, W1F 9EP. All rights reserved.