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Concerned Grandmother
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Hi my son is having his first child and my first grandchild, they went for there 12 week scan on monday and had the shocking news of Raised N T 5.4 which indicates chromosomal abnormlities, gentic syndromes, cardiac defects, she has opted for the amnio test at 15 weeks but my concern is the hospital we are attending is not the best. I have asked to be referred to kings college hospital to be told to shut up and she is my daughter i feel so frustrated and i only want the best for mum and baby. Has anyone had this problem and has had follow up scans which has seen the neck lining reduce. My son is only 21 and his partner is 19 (this wasn't a planned pregnacy but it is very welcomed)
In Response to Concerned Grandmother http://www.handbag.com/social/forums-family-parenting_pregnancy-birth_concerned-grandmother?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Family%20and%20parentingForum:157Discussion:7a275cc1-1408-407f-803f-76638f596232Post:adff9b64-5135-4826-9972-92b1ef165182 :
I'm afraid I can't help with regards to being able to choose what hospital to go to, but I wanted to offer some reassurance about the amnioscentesis if they choose to have it. The NT result that your daughter has been given is only marginally above what is classed as 'normal' - I can't remember if the 'normal' is classed as 4mm or 5mm, but I my midwife told me that she had seen babies with a reading of over 15mm who still went to term and were delivered as perfectly healthy babies.
Personally I wouldn't raise your hopes about a reduced reading at the follow up scan. Our 12week scan showed a reading only 0.5mm above the norm, so we very much hoped the follow up would show this to be incorrect, but basically all the follow up is is a scan using a more accurate machine - it's unlikely that the fluid would signuficantly reduce in the short time between the two scans.
With regards to your concerns about the hospital - try to remember what a shock your daughter and partner have just recieved and how worried they are already without adding anxiety about the quality of the hospital. These people are trained and are using the best technology available to them to help your daughter. Personally we found the most traumatic thing about the amnio was the weeks of waiting to have it done and then the two week wait for full results. The test itself is no more painful than a regular injection, but of course it is a very personnal choice whether or not to have it because of the risk to the baby.
Best wishes to you all.
I'm afraid I can't help with regards to being able to choose what hospital to go to, but I wanted to offer some reassurance about the amnioscentesis if they choose to have it. The NT result that your daughter has been given is only marginally above what is classed as 'normal' - I can't remember if the 'normal' is classed as 4mm or 5mm, but I my midwife told me that she had seen babies with a reading of over 15mm who still went to term and were delivered as perfectly healthy babies.
Personally I wouldn't raise your hopes about a reduced reading at the follow up scan. Our 12week scan showed a reading only 0.5mm above the norm, so we very much hoped the follow up would show this to be incorrect, but basically all the follow up is is a scan using a more accurate machine - it's unlikely that the fluid would signuficantly reduce in the short time between the two scans.
With regards to your concerns about the hospital - try to remember what a shock your daughter and partner have just recieved and how worried they are already without adding anxiety about the quality of the hospital. These people are trained and are using the best technology available to them to help your daughter. Personally we found the most traumatic thing about the amnio was the weeks of waiting to have it done and then the two week wait for full results. The test itself is no more painful than a regular injection, but of course it is a very personnal choice whether or not to have it because of the risk to the baby.
Best wishes to you all.
As a grandmother who's offspring are expecting numbers nine and ten, I found your post quite disturbing, not because of your daughter in law's results, but because of the things you have put.
"my concern is the hospital we are attending"
You are the Grandmother, not the Mother, and it really is not your business which hospital they attend.
"I have asked to be referred to kings college hospital"
If I was your daughter in law, I would be seriously worried about how much you are going to interfere in their bringing up of this child.
Be excited, be supportive, be there if they ask for help or advice, but otherwise just stand back and be a proud Grandmother.
"my concern is the hospital we are attending"
You are the Grandmother, not the Mother, and it really is not your business which hospital they attend.
"I have asked to be referred to kings college hospital"
If I was your daughter in law, I would be seriously worried about how much you are going to interfere in their bringing up of this child.
Be excited, be supportive, be there if they ask for help or advice, but otherwise just stand back and be a proud Grandmother.
amen to the above.
I think you need to have a word with yourself and back off a fair bit or you run the risk of getting the label as an interfering mother in law! Be there for them if they need you and they may might but don't force yourself into their business.
Good luck with the tests.. I hope things turn out not as bad as expected.
I think you need to have a word with yourself and back off a fair bit or you run the risk of getting the label as an interfering mother in law! Be there for them if they need you and they may might but don't force yourself into their business.
Good luck with the tests.. I hope things turn out not as bad as expected.
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