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scan update, some good & some not so good news

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ska1982
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
Alright so, the good news is that babes is growing fine, seems healthy and is very active. Also, my gut feeling was right and we are having a little boy ! I'm really really chuffed about that!

The not so good news is that they picked up a cleft lip this morning. I've been for a more in depth scan at the hospital this afternoon which confirmed it. They can't tell whether the palate is affected and we probably won't know until the birth. Luckily, nothing else abnormal was picked up this afternoon. I've had a bit of a shock but trying to be positive and am grateful it is 'only' that and everything else seems fine. However, it does mean an increased risk for Down's and other chromosomal abnormalities and I need to decided about having an amnio or not. Pants really as the Down's screener came back fine 1:9200.

I've got a scan in 2 weeks to have another look just in case they missed something and the hospital will put us in touch with the right support team in the meantime as babes will need surgery and is likely to have some trouble feeding / breathing etc.

So yeah, it's been a bitter-sweet day today.
<div><div><div><div><div><div><strong><font size="2" color="#00ccff">It's a boy!</font></strong><br /><font size="2"><font color="#00ccff"><strong><a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lbdf.l
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MojoAngel
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
Firstly -yay!!!! a boy!!!!

Second...I would say that it's good news that you're being put in touch with the right ppl at the hospital. I do hope everything turns out as well as possible for your lil fella xxx
<div><a href="http://www.pregnology.com/pregnancy/06/02/2010" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.pregnology.com/preggoticker2/777777/000000/My%20pregnancy/06/02/2010.png" border="0" alt="Pregnancy t
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Chickuk2
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
Hi Ska
That must be a big shock. Hope you are doing OK but take some time to get used to it. I have a cleft lip myself. Obviously I don't know too much about what it was like when I was a baby but I don't think it caused too many problems for my mum - I was bottle fed but I think that would have been her plan anyway. I had my surgery at age 3 months and then a few check ups during childhood, and I don't think there was too much else. I have totally normal hearing and everything else about me is reasonably normal...! There are different degrees of severity, especially in terms of whether a cleft palate is also involved, but the surgeons are hugely skilled at repairs, and with luck your baby will just have this small mark and in all other respects will be totally perfect. I hope so.
There is a charity called CLAPA which you might find useful to look up, their website has lots of information for parents and families, and I think you can ring them if you want to talk it over and offload.
Feel free to contact me if you want to discuss at all. Don't feel bad if you do feel bad about it, it's a blow to your dreams of a perfect child, but he will still be gorgeous.
______________________________________<br />Chick
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Strudel1
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news

How lovely, a little boy Congratulations, I guess you can start thinking about names and nursery colours and stuff like that now

All the best with the upcoming tests too, it sounds like you have some tough decisions re. the ammnio, but if the Down's screen has come back so low then that's positive.

Sorry I don't know much about these things, but as mojoangel says, you are in the best hands and they'll look after you and bubba to the best of their ability I'm sure.

<font color="#333333"><strong>________________________________<br /></strong></font><strong><br /><br />hence, the potato thus looks like a penis.<br /><br />Posted by </strong><strong>satsumakitten <
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fiery-petite
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
Just had to reply to your post. I've spent the last 6yrs working on a maternity ward and come across many babies with cleft lip and/or palate. I would definitely get in touch with CLAPA www.clapa.com http://www.clapa.com as they will offer you lots of support, and info from parents who have experienced it. If your DRF is low and you are concerned about the amnio, then you need to consider it carefully (if there were further problems would it make you re-consider your pregnancy? if not, then it's probably not worth it).

Your hospital should contact CLAPA as soon as baby is born and they try to visit you within 24hrs of birth. If you choose to bottle feed then they will provide you with free special bottles and teach you how to feed effectively. You can breastfeed though if you prefer.

Good luck with your next scan. And congratulations on your news of a gorgeous baby boy x
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chocolatejouk
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
Congrats on the boy news! Are you chosing names yet?

Good luck for the next few months, I'm sure you'll have some up and down moments xxx Hang in there!
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MissDem
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news

hi ska

Congrats for your little boy!

As far as the "problem" goes you've already had some great advice/support but I wanted to offer you two anecdotals.

i) My mum was told during her pregnancy with me that I had a cleft-palate and that she should consider termination. She chose to see through her pregnancy and clearly I'm fine - at least in that respect!

ii) A friend of mine at uni had a baby girl with a cleft-palate whom I saw when she was around 18 months old - perhaps I'm the most unobservant person in the world but I'd have had absolutely no idea if her mum hadn't told me - the surgery performed was undetectable to *my* eye!
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ska1982
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
Hi everyone!
First of all a big thank you for all your responses!

Mojo - the team seem really lovely and organised, they're coming out next week to see us at home and talk things through. They might even join us at the next scan in 2 weeks. I'm feeling very grateful that they are there and are so well informed and lovely.

Chick and MissD - thanks for sharing your positive experiences! It's really nice to hear things can work out just fine. I got in a real stress about mainly the possibility of other problems (I work with SEN kids and love my work with them, but it made me for the first time more aware of the parents of these little ones and how hard it must be / have been). The lip doesn't concern me that much.. the gum and palate a little more for obvious things like feeding and speech but also because we wanted to raise little one bilingually and if his hearing isn't quite 100% then we might have to reconsider that. But like I said, fingers crossed, one day at a time and hoping for the best outcome now.

Strudel and Fiery_petite - I think we've decided not to go with the amnio, like you said I'm not sure what we would actually do with the results if it showed other issues. I don't think either of us could not have this boy now, it would be terribly sad if there where deeper issues but he's still a very special gift we are lucky to have.

Chocolatejo - we have been pondering over names and have a couple of favourites + we want to use my granddad's name as a middle name as he was a lovely down to earth man and if our boy could be a bit like him then that would be so nice.

Hope I've replied to everyone!! Thanks again for your input and support - much appreciated. I'm feeling better and calmer, just about getting into 'organised' mode now, making phone calls for appointments and stuff.
Sx
<div><div><div><div><div><div><strong><font size="2" color="#00ccff">It's a boy!</font></strong><br /><font size="2"><font color="#00ccff"><strong><a href="http://lilypie.com/"><img src="http://lbdf.l
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MissDem
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
I'm glad you're OK, I worried all yesterday about what I'd posted thinking I'd made it sound trite and stupid - and I tried to log on this morning to apologise but have only just been able to get back on.

I'm glad you've made a decision about the amnio. My OH and I feel the same way - we've talked about it and both feel (although he respects my decision as my body!) that the results of the amnio would not change how we feel about bringing a child in to the world. What I mean is - if we got bad news from the amnio I wouldn't wish to terminate the pregnancy. I would however spend the rest of my pregnancy in a complete bloody tizz!

I told OH your news yesterday and he said he'd been speaking to a woman in a shop yesterday who'd had a cleft-lip, his verdict? "she was f*cking sexy babe". Not sure if that's what you had in mind...

Btw, I think raising your son bilingual is lovely!
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kkwork1
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Subject: scan update, some good & some not so good news
Sorry to hear that you've had some bad news Ska although pleased to hear that you're getting the support you need. Hope everything turns out ok.

Before I forget, congratulations on your blue bump!
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